The Huck Before Christmas
By Bill Cernansky 12/21/2000 with some minor edits
Gather 'round, children, so better to hear
A wondrous story of holiday cheer
Of Frisbees and reindeer and D.C. muck
And a mystical, magical, glorious huck.
'Twas late in December, and all of the rain
Made cutting on the soggy fields quite a pain.
Despite all of this, someone had the idear
To hold a disc tourney at that time of year.
"Come play in the mud at this year's Christmas Fest"
Said the e-mails, to some of the players' behest;
For not every disc player celebrates Yule:
To some, Hanukkah is the holiday rule.
So discussions ensued; a decision was made
That just one big disc tourney game would be played;
Christmas team versus Hanukkah - though it sounds odd,
With each having thirty-two players per squad.
The teams agreed to square off Christmas Eve;
(And the fourth day of Hanukkah - would you believe?)
In the future, the tourney then would get its name
From the team that would win this fortuitous game.
Christmas Eve morning arrived, cold and wet
And at 9 o'clock neither team had arrived yet;
So the team organizers were then forced to yield:
Finally, at 10:30, both teams took the field.
"Game to thirty-five" cried the organizing crew.
"Absolutely no time limit; must win by two."
Then they flipped the discs; Hanukkah would pull first,
And then each team would play the game it had rehearsed.
The game ran for hours; everyone got to play
With only a few arguments, by the way
But neither team could pull ahead more than one;
By 4 P.M. the tourney still wasn't done!
Game tied 50-50, with light fading fast,
The crew called out that "the next point will be last!"
And the Christmas team gathered up, each one believing
They'd surely score from the pull they'd be receiving.
Halfway down the field, in the mud and the grass,
Dived a player as they caught a horrible pass.
And as they gained footing to make their next throw,
Saw an open receiver and cried "Ho, Ho, Ho."
They heaved up a hammer, so long and so true
There's nothing that Hanukkah's defense could do.
What they didn't see, in the downpour and dark,
Were a sleigh and nine reindeer flying over the park.
The hammer, one of history's greatest throws
At just the last second glanced off Rudolph's nose!
It wavered, and wobbled, and blew in the breeze,
And was missed, as the receiver fell to her knees.
The shocked Christmas team, and all its adherents,
Immediately called out "that sleigh's interference!"
Meanwhile, the Hannukah folks had to insist
That it wasn't, because Santa didn't exist.
While both teams were arguing there in the park,
The crew called the game on account of the dark.
And though they were opponents, their call was the same:
"Whether Christmas or Hanukkah, 'twas sure a good game!"
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Brian & Jen are sponsoring “Rob-a-palooza” this weekend as it appears Rob’s actually leaving us this time. Pul-leez RSVP for the palooza.
